Kevin Costner’s Horizon premiere tears: Why are Cannes standing ovations so weirdly long?

Kevin Costner’s Horizon premiere tears: Why are Cannes standing ovations so weirdly long?

https://www.bbc.com/culture/article/20240522-kevin-costners-horizon-premiere-tears-why-are-cannes-standing-ovations-so-weirdly-long

Oh my!  We don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

The self-important celebrities are conducting another session of over-the-top self-congratulations.

Maybe lengthy standing ovations support their delusion that they are political influencers.  It’s hard to say, but it resembles the kind of drama-deficit behavior of those with significant self-doubt problems.

But stop for a minute and consider some “what if” scenarios.

What if we conducted elections by length of standing ovation exercises?

What if the Congress operated on a standing ovation standard to pass legislation?  Or the Supreme Court by standing ovation length?  Or the White House press secretary had to answer questions from the press until a standing ovation occurred?  How about the State of the Union?

How does Andy Warhol’s famous “15 minutes of fame” shibboleth fit into the 24-minute record standing ovation at Cannes?  (Maybe it’s just another manifestation of Bidenomics.)

Will there be standing ovations for college campus protesters?  Will it include paid outside demonstrators (“clappers”) as well as enrolled students?  Will college presidents be kept or replaced based on a standing ovation by the faculty?

Today we award a Molière Citation to the self-important celebrities at the Cannes Film Festival.  And a special mention to Kevin Costner, who probably shed a tear for the $85 million he blew on his ill-critiqued new film.

Can we please have our 7 minutes back?

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